My giant, several-year-long career decision funk is coming very quickly to a head. Like always, I have narrowed down my options to two basic choices, and both seem to have equal merit and risk. In the interest of putting into words the several different aspects of each decision that I have thought about, I'm going to attempt to flesh out my options in this blog, along with the pros and cons of each. Hopefully, this will help me come to a decision, as I'm going to need to make a choice within the next few months...
But first, why do I feel that I must make a decision soon? Basically, I have discovered that the 9-to-5 office life is not for me. When I left Pitt, I did so in large part because I needed to see if I really loved design as much as I thought I did. It was this supposed love that was keeping me from making the long commitment to the Air Force that would have been required of me (ten years). Additionally, I found it difficult to motivate myself in college, so ROTC was complicated by the fact that every single event required me to convince myself to go, which increasingly turned me off to the whole concept.
It's important to note that while I didn't share the enthusiasm of some of my classmates, I didn't wholly dislike the military environment. I find a lot of the "discipline" training trivial, but I feel like if it was an everyday, full-time part of my life, it would become second nature, and therefore insignificant in determining my happiness. In fact, most of the military traditions are just amplified versions of civilian life. For example, both instances offer the possibility of having a superior that you don't agree with or like. The only difference is that in the military, you can not escape this fate.
In fact, it's this mentality that has been the primary source of my denial of this option thus far: the fact that with the military comes a commitment of the next 8 to 12 years of my life. If I get a year or two into it and find out that I don't like it, there is no way to escape it for the next several years. Given my history, I know I am the type of person that gets bored quickly, and this is a very real possibility.
However, the military option definitely has tons of benefits as well. One of my major goals is to get my bachelor's degree, and the military would pay for all of this, as well as help me with the school loans I already have. I would get 30 days paid vacation each year. The income is much better than advertised, and I would actually start out at around the same income that I bring in now, once you include BAH and other benefits. The travel benefits are unmatched, and I would be able to fulfill my desire to travel to the full degree. I would be surrounded each day by people who think like me: athletic, travel-loving people who have faced similar hardships. Finally, the work environment would be ever-changing, both on a day-to-day basis and when I switch bases every few years. In short, if I end up loving my day-to-day job, the military benefits far outweigh the ones I would receive at any civilian job.
Whether I choose that option or not, the goal right now is to put myself in a situation where I can maximize my options, and therefore give myself the best chance to improve my level of happiness. The best way for me to do that right now would be to get my bachelor's degree, and this is the primary source of my second option. The military is certainly not the only way to do that, and I believe it would take longer to do while serving than if I went full time. However, if I choose to stay civilian and try to go back full time, financing becomes a major issue.
Given the amount of school loans I have out already, it's just not possible for me to go back to school on my own dime. I would probably not even be able to get more loans in this financial environment, and I would not want to pay the extra money back even if I was able to get them. This means that if I want to go back, I have to convince a company that I am working for to pay for it. This poses two problems: 1. I would need to already be with a company that I could see myself staying with for the next 5 years (in order to finish my degree and serve 2 years afterward) and 2. I would need to pursue a degree in a major that the company approves and I enjoy. It's extremely unlikely that I will be able to fulfill these scenarios, since 95% of the companies that accept my job title would have me go back to school for engineering. Aside from the major, this option also has the problem of keeping me in the same 9-to-5 desk job environment that I would very much like to escape.
Another side of the civilian option is to find a company that I enjoy working with and gaining experience in my current position while not going back to school. While this will not increase my options, it would further my value (and my paycheck) within my current career field, and increase my chances of securing a better position in the future. However, just like before, it would keep me in the same mundane office environment, without giving me many more options for the future.
The civilian side does have some very tangible benefits to it. The largest benefit to staying civilian is maintaining my freedom. If I get into a job that I don't like, I can easily quit at any time. Also, if I am living in an area that I don't enjoy, I can pick up and move at any time. Aside from career freedom, civilian life also offers a lot of personal freedom. I am free to dress how I please, to go wherever I want and do whatever I want when I am not at work. Also, my hours are very much set in stone, and my boss will rarely, if ever, bother me when I am not at work. Where as in the military, your lifestyle is closely monitored 24/7, a civilian job will not infringe upon your lifestyle, so long as it does not impact your work.
One thing that is very important in this decision is how much I actually practice the freedoms that a civilian life offers. For example, many of the freedoms I would give up in the military are things that I don't really exercise anyway, such as hair length, speaking out against the government, or drug use. Since I do not use these freedoms, I should not place too much emphasis on them. Additionally, I should be certain not to overestimate the "military lifestyle" view of things until I am sure of it's actual impact. Many of the current members of the military claim that it is not much different than an everyday job, and I should do my best to investigate that claim. Finally, I should decide just how important it is to me to have the freedom to change my lifestyle. The military commitment is a calculated risk with a long-term reward or punishment, and I should understand whether or not the benefits to taking that chance outweigh the detriments of civilian life.
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