Guess you can't fight your nature

It's been a long time since I've had a girlfriend.

I'm not sure what it is, but as of late, I've struggled mightily with women. The odd thing is, I possess most of the traits that women seem to want in a man. I'm smart, I'm funny, I'm confident, I can be kind of a dick, etc. However, when it comes down to it, I always somehow manage to screw something up.

I'm sure a large part of my lack of success comes from my beliefs. For example, I loathe the time-honored tradition of men chasing women. Even with all the fighting for equality we've seen recently, it still seems that 98% of the time, men are forced to prove themselves as worthy partners for a woman. Rarely, if ever, will you see a woman chasing around another man...and even if you do, it's likely the man has already proven himself by being in a position of power, being a celebrity, or something similar.

Because of this belief, every time I approach a woman I am fighting my own moral values. Am I only talking to her because I want to prove I am "worthy"? Am i structuring my conversation in a way that would make her think I am desirable, even if it means not being totally honest? Am I placing too much emphasis on her beauty? Despite my constant attempt to change, the very nature of man has me answering "yes" to most of these questions.

I believe that years of facing this conflict, coupled with a few bad experiences with past relationships, have virtually closed me off to the possibility of letting another woman into my life. And the problem is, I think women can intuitively know this when we are talking. Or at least I hope that is the issue. I immediately come across badly, and I struggle to change that image of me.

Of course, after years of dealing with this, I am used to being single. However, as of late I've began to feel pretty lonely. Most of my friends have moved away, and the few that I have remaining are either in serious relationships or have dated consistently for several years. The weight of these influences has finally started to take it's toll on me, and recently it's all I can think about. How can I turn my image around and become attractive to women once again? I can only hope the answer will come to me soon. But even more importantly, I hope the answer won't make me choose between my moral values and my genetic desires.